Thursday, October 31, 2002
Scout has week to declare beliefi am , was, an eagle scout, troop 65, daytona beach florida, and i was, am gay, and i too deny the existance of god
State: Much of the business of state government has gone privateliving under bush in florida, what a scam
Wednesday, October 30, 2002
hi beautiful,
spoke with mom today cause i need my birth certificate
to get into the free clinic in clearwater for my blood pressure,
which i cant get into as i have no proof i live here, god
she remarks she has nightmares i will be homeless
she remarks on and on what a failure i have been and no
talking will make any of it better, she brings up when i got fired
from act corporation over ten years ago and how i dont get
along with my bosses, i mean give me a break
she remarks i live wearing rose colored glasses....
i love her but neither her or carol or dana, or rod, seem to understand
that i cant be the fulfillment of their dreams right now
due to the workers comp stuff and pain
what do you say to your family when they bad mouth you
call you a failure, compare you to your father,
who by the way, they say is nuts and has a personality disorder
i say i have plans to teach, i have plans to get better
but they dont want to hear words, they want to
see me as something i am not
she wants to see me living independently with
some job , i mean, sure, i wish i was at that point also
in my life
i get so down sometimes
its not my problem they worry about me, i didn't ask for
them to have such high expectations
im venting, im sorry
im not even gonna do thanksgiving or christmas with them
again, i was gonna try, but whats the point
i am making a little money babysitting on the weekends now
with some of james friends so they can go out on saturday night,
i make fourty bucks and i gave it all to james
sometimes he gets really mad also, and that i can
completely understand, he will get funds in two months
dave
spoke with mom today cause i need my birth certificate
to get into the free clinic in clearwater for my blood pressure,
which i cant get into as i have no proof i live here, god
she remarks she has nightmares i will be homeless
she remarks on and on what a failure i have been and no
talking will make any of it better, she brings up when i got fired
from act corporation over ten years ago and how i dont get
along with my bosses, i mean give me a break
she remarks i live wearing rose colored glasses....
i love her but neither her or carol or dana, or rod, seem to understand
that i cant be the fulfillment of their dreams right now
due to the workers comp stuff and pain
what do you say to your family when they bad mouth you
call you a failure, compare you to your father,
who by the way, they say is nuts and has a personality disorder
i say i have plans to teach, i have plans to get better
but they dont want to hear words, they want to
see me as something i am not
she wants to see me living independently with
some job , i mean, sure, i wish i was at that point also
in my life
i get so down sometimes
its not my problem they worry about me, i didn't ask for
them to have such high expectations
im venting, im sorry
im not even gonna do thanksgiving or christmas with them
again, i was gonna try, but whats the point
i am making a little money babysitting on the weekends now
with some of james friends so they can go out on saturday night,
i make fourty bucks and i gave it all to james
sometimes he gets really mad also, and that i can
completely understand, he will get funds in two months
dave
so this is how i start
a figure in wet clay
detailed
plaster of paris poured on it, half of it
no undercuts
made into a plaster mold
then slip poured in
then excess slip poured out
fired and bisqued
put together if detailed and undercuts
fired and china paints and or lusters added, a clear glaze
klimt, my originals demons, angels things, and my drawings series
that i started in 1993 while counseling kids at act corporation in holly hill florida
and living in daytona beach
kilns is 25 inches wide, 25 inches tall
i can fire to cone 6 which is okay for porcelain
and i can fire this kiln in a normal outlet in my new apartment
i will buy the kiln and materials when i get my funds
i will move when i get my job and my car
soon
a figure in wet clay
detailed
plaster of paris poured on it, half of it
no undercuts
made into a plaster mold
then slip poured in
then excess slip poured out
fired and bisqued
put together if detailed and undercuts
fired and china paints and or lusters added, a clear glaze
klimt, my originals demons, angels things, and my drawings series
that i started in 1993 while counseling kids at act corporation in holly hill florida
and living in daytona beach
kilns is 25 inches wide, 25 inches tall
i can fire to cone 6 which is okay for porcelain
and i can fire this kiln in a normal outlet in my new apartment
i will buy the kiln and materials when i get my funds
i will move when i get my job and my car
soon
i have always loved beginnings, times
when one can stand up and dust off
i have a new beginning
it started yesterday, it starts with a little bit of money
but it is a new beginning
with this little bit of money
i am to buy a kiln
i am to sculpt ceramic like i did in college
and to start and be started from within
when one can stand up and dust off
i have a new beginning
it started yesterday, it starts with a little bit of money
but it is a new beginning
with this little bit of money
i am to buy a kiln
i am to sculpt ceramic like i did in college
and to start and be started from within
DAVE HELL the artist, the happy person, the one
who loves and is loved, who lights up a room, who
stands out in a crowd, with my tongue in my cheek
so how does one start over with ones personality
i choose not to be sad, i choose not to be depressed anymore
i choose how to deal with chronic pain
i choose how i great each and every new day
who loves and is loved, who lights up a room, who
stands out in a crowd, with my tongue in my cheek
so how does one start over with ones personality
i choose not to be sad, i choose not to be depressed anymore
i choose how to deal with chronic pain
i choose how i great each and every new day
today while discussing friendships and parties my friend james
tells me that i have been a Loner for too long, he sees that i
dont speak to people and i quess i alienate myself, how
in our old age we get stuck in places and get lost in time and space
so i want to perk myself up, to make myself a new, to
add the centuries of sadness and gladness to a new persona
and become someone i would like to become
and that would be: DAVE HELL
tells me that i have been a Loner for too long, he sees that i
dont speak to people and i quess i alienate myself, how
in our old age we get stuck in places and get lost in time and space
so i want to perk myself up, to make myself a new, to
add the centuries of sadness and gladness to a new persona
and become someone i would like to become
and that would be: DAVE HELL
Tuesday, October 29, 2002
Saturday, October 26, 2002
Friday, October 25, 2002
Thursday, October 24, 2002
Monday, October 21, 2002
Sunday, October 20, 2002
good morning sunday morning with james in the house and i quess his new boy friend,
justin and of course i am here, nice day, at least i have a few pain pills left, but soon
to be out and hoping for help from friends, physical therapy tomorrow for my back.
then to the clinic to get this blood pressure under control, hope to find out
settlement amount on monday, then to make plans and how to go about
doing ceramic sculpture again
justin and of course i am here, nice day, at least i have a few pain pills left, but soon
to be out and hoping for help from friends, physical therapy tomorrow for my back.
then to the clinic to get this blood pressure under control, hope to find out
settlement amount on monday, then to make plans and how to go about
doing ceramic sculpture again
Saturday, October 19, 2002
Feeling Antigravity's Pull - Can NASA stop the apple from falling on Newton's head? By Adam�RogersFeeling Antigravity's Pull
Can NASA stop the apple from falling on Newton's head?
Can NASA stop the apple from falling on Newton's head?
U.S. starts talks over N. Korea nukes It is equally unclear is why the White House waited for several weeks after Pyongyang�s alleged admission before making it public.
Sources told NBC News that the Bush administration kept North Korea�s actions a secret, partly to avoid being accused of a double-standard until after Congress passed the war resolution against Iraq.
The government in Pyongyang has made no official comment on the statements by U.S. officials
Sources told NBC News that the Bush administration kept North Korea�s actions a secret, partly to avoid being accused of a double-standard until after Congress passed the war resolution against Iraq.
The government in Pyongyang has made no official comment on the statements by U.S. officials
Friday, October 18, 2002
Thursday, October 17, 2002
Gamma-ray observatory launched
we as a race continue to explore our universe, in spite
of ours and others intentions to start world war three
we as a race continue to explore our universe, in spite
of ours and others intentions to start world war three
from an e mail from teri:
Looking back, it's hard to believe that we have lived as long as we have.
As children we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat.
Our baby cribs were painted with bright colored lead based paint. We often chewed on the crib, ingesting the paint.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors, or cabinets, and when we
rode our bikes, we had no helmets.
We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then rode down the
hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a
few times we learned to solve the problem.
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back
when the streetlights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day.
We played dodge ball and sometimes the ball would really hurt.
We ate cupcakes, bread and butter, and drank sugar soda, but we were never over
weight; we were always outside playing.
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had
to learn to deal with disappointment.
Some students weren't as smart as others, so they failed a grade and were held
back to repeat the same grade.
That generation produced some of the greatest risk-takers and problem solvers.
We had the freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to
deal with it all.
......the greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.......
Looking back, it's hard to believe that we have lived as long as we have.
As children we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat.
Our baby cribs were painted with bright colored lead based paint. We often chewed on the crib, ingesting the paint.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors, or cabinets, and when we
rode our bikes, we had no helmets.
We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then rode down the
hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a
few times we learned to solve the problem.
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back
when the streetlights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day.
We played dodge ball and sometimes the ball would really hurt.
We ate cupcakes, bread and butter, and drank sugar soda, but we were never over
weight; we were always outside playing.
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had
to learn to deal with disappointment.
Some students weren't as smart as others, so they failed a grade and were held
back to repeat the same grade.
That generation produced some of the greatest risk-takers and problem solvers.
We had the freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to
deal with it all.
......the greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.......
Dear Dave,
I have not replied to your other mail because I was not sure what to say to you. Of course I love my nephew but so strenuously object to your destructive life style and self pity when stuff does not work out. I have a feeling that you are bored with family comments and reaction to these things. All want you to succeed in life and be safe and happy. You have never developed the tools of your fine intellect and then used them to grow into maturity, personally and professionally. Just about everything has been said that can be. To continue to get jobs requiring physical output that apparently results in injuries seems strange. You could have developed some more appropriate career by sticking to something fitting your talents. Time is running out on starting anything new. Stop making excuses, and take a more realistic assessment of work. Look at your track record and learn from your mistakes!
Of course we will look forward to seeing you and having a good dinner together.
Love, Carol
I have not replied to your other mail because I was not sure what to say to you. Of course I love my nephew but so strenuously object to your destructive life style and self pity when stuff does not work out. I have a feeling that you are bored with family comments and reaction to these things. All want you to succeed in life and be safe and happy. You have never developed the tools of your fine intellect and then used them to grow into maturity, personally and professionally. Just about everything has been said that can be. To continue to get jobs requiring physical output that apparently results in injuries seems strange. You could have developed some more appropriate career by sticking to something fitting your talents. Time is running out on starting anything new. Stop making excuses, and take a more realistic assessment of work. Look at your track record and learn from your mistakes!
Of course we will look forward to seeing you and having a good dinner together.
Love, Carol
Wednesday, October 16, 2002
Tuesday, October 15, 2002
Monday, October 14, 2002
Sunday, October 13, 2002
Saturday, October 12, 2002
Friday, October 11, 2002
Thursday, October 10, 2002
Wednesday, October 09, 2002
Tuesday, October 08, 2002
Monday, October 07, 2002
Saturday, October 05, 2002
Thursday, October 03, 2002
ive been on my soap box too much today
all about hiv and aids and how i feel gays should have been more responsible
over the years to preven the spread, instead gays are barebacking and
dancing the dance of death here in tampa, in fort lauderdale, and in miami
you can yell at me, im gay, and im mad and pissed off at all of them
love? well thats another big joke, there is no such thing
humans in desperation seek love from others to "feel" good and right
and it s all about bull shit, i mean, give me a break
get your shit together, be happy, and screw seeking your self worth in
another human being
me, yes for sure, bitter and old, and ive been around too long and seen too much
i live in hell and paint it pictures
i am the reincarnation of michelangelo and van gogh,
out of drugs and often sick and tired of life
the rich get richer
and the poor keep fighting for one more day
of clean air
and dont get me started on what we wonderful humans are
doing to this planet, as far as i am concerned, we
should all be erased from this earth and let her heal
we humans are way too selfish
all about hiv and aids and how i feel gays should have been more responsible
over the years to preven the spread, instead gays are barebacking and
dancing the dance of death here in tampa, in fort lauderdale, and in miami
you can yell at me, im gay, and im mad and pissed off at all of them
love? well thats another big joke, there is no such thing
humans in desperation seek love from others to "feel" good and right
and it s all about bull shit, i mean, give me a break
get your shit together, be happy, and screw seeking your self worth in
another human being
me, yes for sure, bitter and old, and ive been around too long and seen too much
i live in hell and paint it pictures
i am the reincarnation of michelangelo and van gogh,
out of drugs and often sick and tired of life
the rich get richer
and the poor keep fighting for one more day
of clean air
and dont get me started on what we wonderful humans are
doing to this planet, as far as i am concerned, we
should all be erased from this earth and let her heal
we humans are way too selfish