below are some e mails, i sent an e mail to my sister, aunt, and uncle on how cool it is that gays are getting married, and shared some of the prejudice i have felt, and my uncle reacted negatively, as did my sister, all i can say is , i am the metallic ape now dave hell (hale)
Subj: hi
Date: 5/19/2004 2:29:03 AM Eastern Daylight Time
From: ZEUSFUELLIGHT
To: BigBlkMusc256
hi, i hope this letter finds you doing well
i dont want to sound "self absorbed", but i wrote a letter to my aunt, uncle, and my sister a few days ago and the reaction has been unexpected, it appears i have not been communicating with my family very well at all over the past few years, they think im really an ass hole, they think i get hurt on jobs on purpose, and in my sisters words, that i play the victim and want to be compensated for it.....
i was such a different person when they knew me, very religious, they have always felt stetson did something to me, and they blame drugs for these changes, my sister states that when ever i contact her via e mail, i always talk about myself and my problems....
they also view me as really paranoid, they show outright anger in these latest e mails,
my mom, dana, my uncle, and aunt, have never liked my father, they feel he really failed and they have always been very critical of him, he has emotional problems but i think he has done well with the things he has had to deal with
they have also been critical of my grandfather, on my mothers side, he was not religious, he refused to go to the first baptist church that they all went to, he was a pharmacist in an all black neighborhook, he drank, and once, when i was a baby, he took me to a bar to show me off, which i thinks is cool
they also feel i have wasted my life, my brains, and my gifts,
i feel like im in good company in a way, with my dad and my papa..
this is the letter my sister sent me today, im not talking to james g about any of this, he has been in such a great mood, and ive been really upbeat these past few weeks, i have even begun to think i can make something of the hand i have been deal
David,
I told you to take what Rod said with a grain of salt, but here's another perspective; you say you've been writing them to "share some of your history" so they'll know you better, but have you taken the time to get to know them better? When you write to me or to them,
it's always about YOU- your health problems, job problems, your Buddhist thought of the day which we don't subscribe to since we're not Buddhists. You have been very self-absorbed since your drug days. Before you got involved with drugs, you were very thoughtful of others. Since then, your life has been one problem after the next in which you were always the victim. You were always getting fired because "someone was out to get you". You were always getting injured. I don't doubt that your injuries are sincere, but you've spent your life being a victim and trying to get compensated for it. You've given lip service to thinking about your family, but you haven't followed through. This past Mother's Day was the first in years that you sent Mom a card. You don't remember her birthday, you don't involve yourself in the day to day happenings of what's going on with Mom, Rod, and Carol, so don't be upset when you feel they're "ripping into you." You probably think I'm ripping into you now, but I've kept silent for a long time about my observations to you and I think you need to hear an objective opinion. Stop blaming the rest of the world and genetics for your situation and take some responsibilities for the bad choices you've made. You can't be involved as a family with occasional e-mails and lip service. We all love you but we hate to see how you've wasted your brains and talent. If you want to get to know your relatives better, it's a two way street. Rod's written 3 books, has had heart bypass surgery, has 3 kids of his own with their own dramas, is more a father to me than my own ever has been, is madly in love with his dog, and I could go on and on. Carol is president of her golf league, has had back and wrist surgery in the past few years, worries about what's going to happen to her when Rod goes, is one of the brightest, well-spoken women I know, etc. Mom is my best friend, inspiration, went back to work after 23 years of marriage to put 2 kids through college and didn't lose her mind in the process, loves babies, movies, TV, her cat, and I'm the one who's going to have to rely totally on myself to take care of her when she can't anymore because I know you won't be able to help me . Please don't see this as an us against you thing. Just stop thinking about yourself so much and genuinely care and get involved with what's happening with US if you want to feel like you're part of family.
I love you,
Danamaybe this is a time, when as i get old, i re think the meaning of family, i really dont have much in common anymore with my family, you and james are more family to me .....maybe this is just a bad month for everyone....
dave
Wednesday, May 19, 2004
Tuesday, May 18, 2004
From : Rodman
Reply-To :
Sent : Tuesday, May 18, 2004 3:59 PM
To :
Subject : RE: hello dana, carol, and rod
| | | Inbox
Dear Dave,
I encourage you to stop wallowing in 25 year-old history. I encourage you to reject the fundamentalists. I encourage you to become aware of intellectual liberal Christians who think. I encourage to look carefully at the following web site and click on "Mission Statement."
The url is http://www.nolongersilent.org/.
Rod
Reply-To :
Sent : Tuesday, May 18, 2004 3:59 PM
To :
Subject : RE: hello dana, carol, and rod
| | | Inbox
Dear Dave,
I encourage you to stop wallowing in 25 year-old history. I encourage you to reject the fundamentalists. I encourage you to become aware of intellectual liberal Christians who think. I encourage to look carefully at the following web site and click on "Mission Statement."
The url is http://www.nolongersilent.org/.
Rod
hello dana, carol, and rod
what a wonderful day to be a proud gay american
when i was at Stetson, and being the outreach director for the baptist campus ministry and living in allen hall, i was asked to write an article about God and homosexuality by the staff of the mad hatter newspaper.
The article got me kicked out of allen hall and the director refused to even submit my request to be a missionary in a foreign country for a year; even after i had already been a summer missionary with the southern baptist convention for two summers in new york and kentucky and had great references from 20 churches and 20 ministers.
That summer was the turning point in my life.
i just moved next door into the building that housed the methodists and made many new friends and was welcomed by their minister
one of my favorite sociology professors, joel wright, asked me during class in front of 30 fellow students, if all gay men were wearing their hair parted in the middle, (my hair was parted in the middle) i just sat in class stunned at his arrogance, that christmas i gave him homemade banana bread and i asked him what advice he would give to a person dealing with the subject of being gay, he told me it was an aberration and i that should date girls
it was 1976
when i graduated in 1977 i received two creativity awards from Stetson, one for my senior thesis on group behavior and mentally handicapped children from the sociology department, and one from the art department for my art work in multi media.....
I was the first gay person to be outed at First Baptist Church by my best friend, and bobby welch told me in person i was "going to hell" if i didn't change my "sinful ways" and that he was praying for me.....
one day, in 2001, at a club in fort lauderdale with james giffin, whom is black, i was actually spat on by another gay person, because i was with a black person....
what a wonderful day to be a proud gay american, to see at last civil rights for all , maybe there is some hope for this country ......to live where people are not judged and hated for whom they love.
being gay is not a sin and loving someone of your own gender is not a sin. i have felt this way since 1976, the bible is in error when it comes to this subject....in great error. i long for a day when christians stop thinking the bible was faxed from God.
who would have ever thought gay men and women would see the day in the united states where we could marry and have normal lives, unafraid of the religious zealots that rule in the senate, congress, white house, and at almost every corner street in almost every church in america.....
i have always felt great sorrow when i hear a christian say: "love the sinner, hate the sin"; the hypocrisy and lack of understanding still overwhelms me when it comes to dealing with evangelical christians (and i used to be an evangelical christian!)....i wish they knew the Christ i know.
love you guys
dave
what a wonderful day to be a proud gay american
when i was at Stetson, and being the outreach director for the baptist campus ministry and living in allen hall, i was asked to write an article about God and homosexuality by the staff of the mad hatter newspaper.
The article got me kicked out of allen hall and the director refused to even submit my request to be a missionary in a foreign country for a year; even after i had already been a summer missionary with the southern baptist convention for two summers in new york and kentucky and had great references from 20 churches and 20 ministers.
That summer was the turning point in my life.
i just moved next door into the building that housed the methodists and made many new friends and was welcomed by their minister
one of my favorite sociology professors, joel wright, asked me during class in front of 30 fellow students, if all gay men were wearing their hair parted in the middle, (my hair was parted in the middle) i just sat in class stunned at his arrogance, that christmas i gave him homemade banana bread and i asked him what advice he would give to a person dealing with the subject of being gay, he told me it was an aberration and i that should date girls
it was 1976
when i graduated in 1977 i received two creativity awards from Stetson, one for my senior thesis on group behavior and mentally handicapped children from the sociology department, and one from the art department for my art work in multi media.....
I was the first gay person to be outed at First Baptist Church by my best friend, and bobby welch told me in person i was "going to hell" if i didn't change my "sinful ways" and that he was praying for me.....
one day, in 2001, at a club in fort lauderdale with james giffin, whom is black, i was actually spat on by another gay person, because i was with a black person....
what a wonderful day to be a proud gay american, to see at last civil rights for all , maybe there is some hope for this country ......to live where people are not judged and hated for whom they love.
being gay is not a sin and loving someone of your own gender is not a sin. i have felt this way since 1976, the bible is in error when it comes to this subject....in great error. i long for a day when christians stop thinking the bible was faxed from God.
who would have ever thought gay men and women would see the day in the united states where we could marry and have normal lives, unafraid of the religious zealots that rule in the senate, congress, white house, and at almost every corner street in almost every church in america.....
i have always felt great sorrow when i hear a christian say: "love the sinner, hate the sin"; the hypocrisy and lack of understanding still overwhelms me when it comes to dealing with evangelical christians (and i used to be an evangelical christian!)....i wish they knew the Christ i know.
love you guys
dave